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Joined 11 months ago
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Cake day: October 17th, 2023

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  • THANK YOU for bringing this up…and acknowledging that it is NOT ok for your partner to badger you and pressure you into having sex - after you have told them “no, not now”, “I’m tired”, “I’m jet lagged”, “I just wanna go to sleep”. When Sophie recounted that story about having sex with Rob and how she finally gave in… my heart sank. Sophie tried to give the story a cute spin, by saying it took Rob 5 minutes to unbutton her pajamas…but I felt horrified.

    Then they show Rob grinning in his confessional - saying the sex was the “icing” on the cake. THIS IS NOT OKAY. Regardless of gender or relationship status, if someone tells you that they don’t feel like having sex, you respect that. Period. No pressuring. No coercion. No guilt tripping. Being in a relationship does not give your partner “all access” to your body, whenever they want. Without boundaries or limitations.

    I’m not saying Rob is a monster or a predator. I don’t know these people in real life and I know this show is heavily edited. HOWEVER, I think Rob gets away with A LOT and might think most rules don’t apply to him… because of how good looking he is. He’s not used to hearing (or comprehending) the word “NO”. I have an ex boyfriend who looks soooo much like Rob and his scenes with Sophie are triggering AF. I was super young and I felt like I should just be grateful that such a gorgeous man wanted to be my boyfriend. He was emotionally and physically abusive. Super controlling. Never respected any of my boundaries… BUT all my friends, family, even strangers would constantly comment on how handsome my boyfriend was and I “better not let him go”. To the point that I tolerated so much abuse because I felt lucky to just be his girlfriend. None of my boundaries were respected, especially in bed. Consent meant nothing to him.

    I hope everyone watching this show knows that consent before sex is non-negotiable… pressuring your partner into sex is not ok. Whether they are a drunk stranger you just met OR your sober spouse of 25 years. If somebody tells you they’re not comfortable having sex in that moment, you need to be a good human being and respect their wishes. Period. Pressuring them until they finally give in to having sex is not “icing on the cake”… it looks a lot like non-consensual sex. In my opinion.