I’m sorry about your mom. I have my brothers beat up copy of house of leaves, he died 15 years ago, and I still haven’t gotten through it. Not sure if I even want to finish it but I’ve tried so many times lol. It’s now in a box in my in laws garage with some other precious books I kept after I moved countries. Hoping to get my couple boxes of books next year. Maybe I’ll try again when I bring my books home.