I have cleaned out my bookcase, and discovered there were books I guard that I never returned in 3 situations:
- Not returning public school class literature books or textbooks, from more than 20 years ago.
- Public Libraries of cities I no longer live in, and are at an International distance from me, from more than 20 years ago.
- Friends I have lost wayward contact with but I still have books that I STOLE from their bookshelves, from more than 20 years ago.
I feel like this guilt might be preventing me reading, in some ways. I don’t know where to begin to resolve it effectively to return these books, if they need/want/have to be returned.
Probably pointless/impossible to return the books themselves so make a general amends with a donation to an adult literacy program or similar.
I’ll make a pact with you - I’ll text my ex-roommate and admit I accidentally stole her book if you text your friends.
Sorry for nicking your really lovely hardback cookbook [name redacted], I haven’t touched it and it’s good as new.
When my mother was in her 50s an old friend sent her a check in the mail with an apology letter stating she had stolen some books from her house when they were in their 20s. My mother had zero recollection of these books and was kind of sad her friend had carried this guilt around for so long about something my mother would have happily given her.
She cashed the check and bought used books her friend would like and mailed them with a note that said, “You can always steal my books.”
So yeah, if you return those stolen books it might lead to a rekindling of friendship or a box full of gently used paperbacks, but you will have done the morally right thing regardless of the outcome.
You should try to return books you “stole” from old friends, along with a note. You’ll feel better. For the library books, literature books, see if your local Friends of the Library can use them for their sales. Old textbooks, contact the schools if they’re still around. Tell them about the books and ask if they can use the books somehow (doubtful) and if you can make a donation to their scholarship funds. Any books that remain, count them, multiply by $5, and donate that amount to your local library, Head Start Program, etc.
I work in a library and I cannot tell you how excited we get about long-overdue books being returned. Everyone from the circulation staff to the catalogers in the back loves seeing books that have been checked out for a long time and particularly impressive specimens (think 20 or 30+ years) are usually taken from office to office so everyone gets to see it. I’ve never heard anyone ever shame the person who returned the book or gripe about the fact that the book should have been returned sooner.
(I’ve only just realized while typing this out how bizarre this must sound. I swear, librarians aren’t starved for entertainment – we just love books.)
Well, I have known librarians and I actually find them to be of my favorite type of people, so it doesn’t surprise me. Thank you so much for your response! I’ll do my best to return all of the stolen books sooner rather than later.