It happened with Kalani and Asuelu. It was mentioned to Danielle when Yohan wanted to move to the U.S. Now, it’s Manuel demanding it from Ashley.
I understand that it’s a cultural thing, but why do parents want to put this kind of stress on their children? I feel like it’s a tradition that’s been passed down and since they did it for their parents, it is just expected. Even just a grace period to help them get on their feet before they start sending $200 or $300 a month could alleviate the stress.
I’m from Canada and it’s extremely financially hard here, I couldn’t imagine sending money to anyone every month. I don’t know exactly how it is in the U.S., but I would think $300 is still a lot for anyone to send monthly. Not to mention, these people only have one source of income since the person coming can’t legally work until they get their green card. I know that it’s really a lack of communication on their end, but it really seems that the family is demanding as well, like it is incredibly toxic. Is this a normal thing or is it just exaggerated for T.V.?
In many countries, there is no such thing as an old age pension. There is no social security. Job opportunities once you hit 50 are non-existent. This was a job ad in the Philippines just to serve fastfood. If you’re short and have wonky eyes and limited English, your opportunities become much more limited!
https://preview.redd.it/0lttxo18by2c1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5098bf53f03b7901c81686735d98aec0ebf1880c
The family is the support network. My wife in the UK has those pressures and I support her in assisting her mother back home. The brothers and the aunts…unless life or death, I don’t like the support network extending to them. But parents, there is an obligation for them whether we like it or not.
Damn! And they had to market servers positions as “entertainers” to get around that “you can’t set out to hire just pretty young things, Frank.”
Damn, they even went for the teeth and complexion. Imagine needing to be a hottie to work serving potatoes. I thought I had it rough not being born cute enough to be a Hooters girl!
The helping your wife is key. I had to stop dating middle class white dudes because I’d send my mom and brother money. All American born family here. But I did have to help my family out. So that also meant I couldn’t afford to do the things my white middle class friends who made the same amount of money as me did. So when it came to dating the white middle class guys, they seemed to have more of a problem with me sending my brother and mom money. Especially since I was sending my brother money while he was incarcerated.
Then I got a Texican boyfriend. I mentioned my brother needed new shoes and I had to also help my mom, and actually had to fly home asap to see her because she had cancer. Texican shows up at my apartment with what he could afford $150. I didn’t even ask. But unlike previous boyfriends he didn’t question my sending family money.
He understood because he would send money to his grandparents also. We eneded up breaking up because he decided to move back to West Texas tiny town to take care of his grandparents who raised him and I couldn’t imagine moving to a rural town so soon, again.
He’s the ex all others ended up being secretly compared to.
In the US there’s also no pension anymore (except for teachers, police/fire, and government for the most part) and few if any job opportunities for over 50s. Hardly anyone can afford to retire in the US now.
I’m not qualified to talk about US social security. Every US member on 90DF seems compelled to talk about their 401K or something as part of the contrived storyline, so there is clearly more opportunity to save for retirement. I don’t think Potato Corner in Philippines are paying into their employee’s pension fund nor providing their employees the opportunity to earn more than is needed for day to day existence. And that is the big difference. A 50year old in the US or Europe has realistic opportunity to put money aside from their salaries to help later in life. A Filipino in a middle class job might have funds to help for a medical incident, but putting money aside to help in old age… well, not in this lifetime.
Of course you are entitled to bemoan the plight of American retirees and how your country should potentially take better care of them. But putting their plight in the same sentence as a retiree in a developing country is a bit of a nonsense.
Of course it’s easier in the US than in the Philippines. But it’s not easy here either and that’s a problem on this show with foreigners thinking everyone is rich and money isn’t a problem. Most people I know here in the States are struggling right now. Most have little to no retirement and have almost nothing or literally nothing to put aside every month. I don’t know a single person even over 40 let alone 50 that’s been able to find a job easily. There’s tons of age discrimination.
I’m 43… turning 44 in January. I don’t think I’m quite in the scrap heap when it comes to the job market if I found out I was fired tomorrow.
Perspectives in other countries can be difficult to manage. When my wife’s relatives think I’m earning between $60-80k (in GBP equivalent currency) annually, it’s not just their eyes which light up. 2nd cousin Rolando suddenly makes himself known and that he would very much like a place on this gravy train (and I’ve never told them how much I earn, but a bit of Googling makes it easy for them to get a ballpark figure).
If I earned that in the Philippines, I could live like a king. To them, I am rich. The bit which they don’t understand is the cost of living in the west and how much I lose to taxes. Even after nearly 6 years, they cannot compute that my mortgage has got 18 years left on it. The amount I pay in tax per month would feed and clothe them for 6 months. That said, even after I give them my 1st world problems, the struggles they have far outweigh the struggles that poor people face in the west.
Good perspective. Of course in comparison to poor countries, we look rich. But most often we’re not, and you see that play out on 90 day. I’m also over 40 and have faced age discrimination in the job market many times. I have little to no retirement. I’ve been in student loan debt for years. Rent and mortgage costs have tripled over the last couple years. Here in the US no one can even afford to get a car loan because the interest rates have skyrocketed even for those with good credit; and the car prices are out of reach for most people even used. It’s hard out there. People struggle to buy groceries even with an average income.