I support Shariyah’s overall aim of evaluating Sarper’s suitability for a committed, exclusive, long-term relationship. Marriage, as Shakinah describes it.
But I feel as though she’s filling her weekend with some overly picky critiques. I mean, if you really want to focus on the DMs, and especially with this man I think that’s not a bad idea, then maybe give the collection of empty liquor bottles a pass? The one thing Shakinah is able to handle without you is complaining about Sarper’s decor.
And I think Shariyah knows that it would be a good idea to pay attention to how Sarper treats Shakinah. You don’t have to infer or project to see the deficiencies in that. He’s right there doing it. So maybe focus more on that.
I know she thinks she’s helping Shakinah by arguing with Sarper about some of these things. And I suppose if you look at Shakinah’s relationship history and her tendency to avoid conflict, that might be good, as well. But I just keep thinking it’s taking up a lot of time if they’re only spending one weekend together.* And so is walking out.
*Like the manufactured urgency in the Hoarders show when people are moving like molasses on a three-story Victorian full of stuff and somehow they only have the crew for two days.
Garbage is garbage, and yes people collect it but just because they place value on it doesn’t make it anything less than garbage. It’s just a quirk/flaw of their own mind. As soon as they are gone, it will go into the trash unless one of their kids also developed the mental flaw of placing value on trash.
If you enjoy having something around or it means something to you, what does it matter whether it was free garbage or some $300 teapot?
When I see people collecting “valuable,” non-garbage things in the hope they will be worth more in the future, it seems pathetic and I feel kind of sorry for them. So I suppose it’s a different piece of worldview among us in this conversation that comes from an attitude toward objects that’s probably formed in childhood.