I feel like I struggle with this in all facets, especially as I love fantasy books and it tends to make me feel more down about my real, mundane life, but I feel like I notice the most impact when it comes to relationships.

This isn’t just my current one, but also great relationships I’ve had in the past that ended amicably. I’m in a great relationship now. He’s loving, caring, attentive, romantic, handsome, hard-working, etc etc. But I feel like every time I read a romance novel (especially one written by a woman), it makes me look at all of my relationships in a new light in my head. No one is freaking perfect and lord knows I’m far from it, but a lot of the male love interests I’ve read about in novels are portrayed to perfection with the perfect amount of emotional intelligence that just no real person has.

I don’t know. I love my current relationship and I’m very serious about it, but I don’t love how romance books always ignites this insanely unachievable hopelessly romantic side of me. Do I just have to stop reading completely lol? Is anyone else like this? What can I do?

  • entropynchaos@alien.topB
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    10 months ago

    I’ve never read a romance novel of any kind with a totally healthy, mutual, equal relationship. There are always issues, even in really positive books. Jealous women, obsessive men, alpha antics, miscommunication, possessiveness; what have you.

    I come out of romance books appreciating my real life relationship even more because it’s based on equality of relationship, no one person “protecting” or “possessing” another, no one trying to shove particular roles down anyone’s throat, etc.