Why I think he is emotionally abusive:

  1. He doesn’t translate everything as he should and only translates in a manner that suits his situation and needs.

  2. Omits essential information all the time.

  3. Right before the wedding he decides to break up because she confided in her parents. But it’s okay when he does the same and turns everyone against her. Who runs to their mommy after there’s been a fight with a partner and talks shit about them to their entire family?

4.He always has to have the upper hand: Threatens to leave Kimberly or asks her to leave in every fight, Whenever he is asked to make a compromise - “Am I your servant?” “I’m not your servant” wth does that even mean?

  1. In effect he has entirely isolated her from his family and is trying to isolate her from her own family too.

  2. Straight up lied about the family situation and “wifely duties”.

  3. No safe space for Kimberly to go to, no one to confide in

Controlling someone in that manner and stripping away their identity bit by bit is absolutely not okay. I say this not because Kimberly is expected to make compromises, but because she is being expected to keep quiet about things that bother her and change the way she thinks. The situation is classic 101 guide in how to break someone’s spirit and make them complacent.

  • DesireStDiva@alien.topBEnglish
    1·
    10 months ago

    Kim is not the queen she believes she is. She lived with him a year previously. To not know a word of their language, kitchen traditions and cooking, shopping, customs, etc is amazing. To not have supervised the remodeling of their apartment in that year’s time is shocking! She didn’t start a business. Didn’t tell her own future? A whole year of what–sitting and screaming? I believe her stepmother realizes she an adult sized spoiled brat! She owns this situation–not TJ and his family. She blames the others for not taking the time to fully explain the wedding events–yea, like they are doing all the work and expense, and you are still doing nothing but complaining. Why didn’t she do some research? Poor TJ!

      • digitulgurl@alien.topBEnglish
        1·
        10 months ago

        This is one of the first posts I’ve seen not blaming Kim so I don’t know what you’re on about.

    • La_BrujaRoja@alien.topBEnglish
      1·
      10 months ago

      She did not live with him for that year, unless he lived in the separate apartment she had while she was a university student, which I doubt since he’s supposedly so religious that he couldn’t sleep in bed with her in his family’s house until they were married. And he pretended to be more “western”, lying to her when she asked him about being expected to be a traditional conservative wife.

      She can’t start a business there because she’s not eligible to work there yet.

      Her father and stepmother both thought she was being treated badly, her stepmother even said it during one of the pre-wedding ceremonies and her dad wanted her to postpone the wedding and go back with them to the US.

      She did help plan the apartment in detail and picked out materials while she was there, by constructing started AFTER she was came back in the US when her student visa expired and she had to get a different visa to return to India and get married.

      TJ and his family are trash.