Hi, a few days behind but I’m a licensed professional counselor and think this is very common. OP’s response below is also very good. In addition to being a therapist, I’m also married to a man with Bipolar Disorder, and in our early years when he would have episodes, I quickly noticed he took everything out on me but would tone it down for others. I asked his mom about it and she said “he does that to whoever is closest to him. It used to be me, but now it’s you.” My personal theory is that it’s easier to do this to those you know will stick by you. You know friendships and casual relationships are not unconditional. They can walk away easily if you go overboard. But things like marriage and family, which feel more permanent, mean you can take off the mask without fear of being kicked to the curb. Obviously, this gets abused sometimes, resulting in being cut off from family or in divorce, but I think that’s the initial reasoning. “This person has promised to always love me, I don’t have to pretend with them, I can just be real.”
All that being said, I’m not sure that’s the reason with Jovi, as he and Yara have both openly thrown around the idea of divorce multiple times. OP’s explanation for Jovi is pretty good. I also think the drama may be hyped up because no matter all the problems we see through the shows, their relationship has seemed to stay solid. I hope that’s the case. I have a problem with Jovi’s addiction to strippers and strip clubs, but I want both him and Yara to be happy. I also understand his reasoning for not taking the closer job for the most part, even if he 100% should have discussed it with Yara before making the decision.
I don’t know, I don’t buy that Yohan doesn’t want the expensive lifestyle. He has literally said that he deserves to get everything he wants and do nothing. Sounds bougie to me.
Don’t get me wrong, they’re both tools, but Yohan has made it clear he mostly wants an American sugar mama.