Truthfully, I thought she had a lot of patience especially when they were burning literal shit & sprinkling piss in the house. I think she’s a a basket case at times, but I haven’t seen her do anything that should equal this amount of hate (at least that I remember) . She was literally saying she was depressed and TJ didn’t do a single thing but gaslight her into going back to America and told her it was her own fault. His family seem insufferable & I’m sure most people on here wouldn’t be able to deal with that. Sharing a space with a brother & stepmom who are condescending and rude and demand you to do things that wasn’t planned would make me scream too.
As an Indian man born and raised in the west, I saw this coming weeks ago when this season first started airing. I got like 20 upvotes, but I don’t think anybody took me seriously.
The reality is that Indian culture is very very different from American culture. American culture emphasizes individualism and the nuclear family (to an extent). Indian culture emphasizes the family (nuclear and extended) as well as the greater community (e.g. caste).
A white girl from Alabama can’t just up and move to India unless she’s willing to buy fully into the culture. And there’s no way she buys into the culture so long as she doesn’t learn Hindi.
Tejaswi is an asshole. I don’t dispute that. But Tejaswi is like so many other Indian men who just don’t understand that women can be much more emotional creatures than them. Unless they’re exposed to more western media and more western influences…they’re not built to handle expressive women. If anything, the role of the man in traditional culture is to make money, which Tejaswi sees himself fulfilling pretty well. There’s a reason he brought that up during the argument - it was him basically saying “I’m holding up my end here, so get shit together on your end”.
I would say the majority of traditional Indian women aren’t all that expressive or emotional with their husbands. I suspect so many of them seek out that affection with their sons, which is why so many Indian men end up coddled and devoted to their mothers.
I’m still trying to figure out why Tejaswi’s dumb ass was so intent on marrying this girl, knowing full well she never had the makings of a traditional housewife.
Thank you for this! I didn’t see your first post on it but this was very insightful.
Is the constant lying actually socially acceptable in this culture? That has bothered me from the start with both Sumit and TJ on this show. I mean Sumit lied to Jenny and lied to his parents and then tried to act like it was no big deal that he failed to mention getting married to someone else and that he lied to his parents about the nature of his relationship with Jenny and then he has continually lied to his parents telling them that he wants kids when he has made it abundantly clear that he never wants to be a father. TJ seems to be following the exact same kind of pattern. He acts like it’s no big deal that he’s lied to Kim about a long list of things. Then he actively lies to her and his mother when he’s translating between them. There was another guy from India who lied to his girlfriend and his family a couple seasons ago too and I really sympathize with Kim screaming her head off because that’s pretty close to where I’d be if I found out that someone had been lying to me left and right about pretty much everything we’d ever talked about in our relationship. All of that is serious red flag material to western women and I’m just curious if Indian women are socialized to expect that from men because it’s maddening just to watch for me.
No. Come on, nobody likes lying anywhere. You know that.
I think you’re misconstruing what Sumit and Tejaswi (and Rishi too) are trying to do here. I’ve watched all three of them. I don’t think they’re actively out there trying to lie. They’re trying to obfuscate and delay things as much as possible to try and avoid confrontation. They’re not really so much liars as they are cowards.
I had a similar experience recently where my brother was organizing a quick weekend trip with me and our local cousins. He purposefully avoided inviting one cousin he doesn’t like much. I told him to invite the cousin before word gets out about the trip because then that’ll cause tension in the family. He didn’t. He just kept saying “when the moment’s right, I’ll try and invite him”. Long story short - he never invited him and the ostracized cousin found out, which caused some considerable drama.
Maybe you can argue this particular brand of cowardice is more prevalent among Indian men. I’m still not sure.