I definitely don’t think these two will have a healthy relationship and I think they need to separate ASAP. But I also feel like shekinah was being a little unfair to the baby conversation. Tell him that her ex made her raise a kid alone and that she doesn’t wanna do it again- but not giving him the opportunity to prove different. Her ex husband didn’t work out in marriage so she could say the same things about marriage but she’s not. If she doesn’t wanna have a baby that’s 100% her choice and her line to draw but I feel like using her past as an excuse is unfair to sarper. He can’t change what happened and he can’t show her the future. Deny him a baby because you don’t want your body to go through that not this “well my ex did this and that” I feel like that’s a really immature way to view things. Same with Mary’s “I’m insecure because I’ve been done wrong” I get it that it’s hard to think someone will do you right after so many failures. But to hold you current partner that you say you trust, love, and want a future with accountable for YOUR past is unfair. There’s plenty of reasons for them to not have a baby but her dwelling on that just irks me and feels very high school
Babies aren’t the kind of thing you give people “chances” with imo. If you’re uncertain about who to have them with or if to have them at all, you probably should simply not have one to be on the safe side. It’s not a puppy, it’s a whole human being and if you’re taking care of them right, it can be taxing on multiple levels.
Saying “I’ve already done this and the other dad didn’t help” seems harsh but all we can go on is experience and critical thinking skills to make decisions. And while using her experiences to judge Sarper’s potential parenting might seem wrong, his own past is even less reassuring. There’s literally nothing about him that suggests strong paternal urges/qualities or any degree of selflessness. He’s already thrown away one kid.
In the end it’s her body, mental health and financial/emotional well being on the line if she gets pregnant and he can’t or won’t be a good father. I don’t blame her at all for not putting all that on the line again at her age to placate some guy who told her he’d forget about her in days bc she didn’t just go with what he wanted lol. No one owes this guy a baby because he wants a do over.