They said early on in this season that she lived in India for a year before deciding to move there permanently to be with TJ. Did people not see where she said that the things she chose for the apartment construction were not what she picked out before she left? Why is everyone saying she should have researched the culture? I’m pretty sure living there for a year can equal to doing some research on the internet.

  • originalschmidt@alien.topB
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    1
    ·
    10 months ago

    Seriously everyone is always blaming Kimberly for everything but then we constantly see TJ ignoring her, lying to her, keeping her in the dark… it is a damn shame how much hate she is getting from her fellow women!!! TJ clearly misrepresented everything and has little respect for her, yet so many on this sub call her crazy… like, that’s what men did to us for centuries, look up the origins of the term hysteria, hyst/o as a prefix mean uterus, so hysteria is literally “crazy because you have a uterus” and women used to be subjected to shock treatment and stays in asylums because their husbands didn’t find they were happy enough and they’d end up diagnosed with hysteria and going through all these insane “treatments”

    It just blows my mind how much a predominantly female community can basically gaslight Kimberly as of most of us didn’t have POS bf’s like this that made us feel crazy to the point of screaming…

    • BlouseBarn@alien.topB
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      10 months ago

      There’s definitely a lot of internalized misogyny on this sub. I know it because I used to have a lot of it myself (I think all women have at least a little because patriarchy). Then I learned to do better, so I did better. It’s been a lifelong process for me, though, and I’m by no means perfect. Still, I was in denial for a long time too, so I get it, to some extent. Just don’t stay there.

      • originalschmidt@alien.topB
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        10 months ago

        Yeah, I definitely feel like I have worked through all of my internal misogyny and I just hate how woman can be to each other!!! We should be holding each other up not tearing each other down

      • Acrobatic_Low1398@alien.topB
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        10 months ago

        I think my issue with her is how arrogant she sounded almost immediately. It has nothing to do with misogyny but disliking anyone who speaks like that. For me it’s not that she reacts to something’s as I understand the frustration but it’s how she speaks about them.

    • minivatreni@alien.topB
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      10 months ago

      Your comment is spot on! I feel sorry for Kimberly. She sacrificed everything, and TJ, nothing. All she asked was for clear communication from him, which he couldn’t even do.

      Terrible that people are bashing her when she left everything for him and then he lied to her when she got there

    • Acrobatic_Low1398@alien.topB
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      10 months ago

      But my dislike for her began almost immediately. It wasn’t how she reacted to all the stuff in India but she spoke in a very high and mighty type of way instantly. I get some of the responses she’s had although I think she’s a bit immature with all the faces she pulls. I fully blame TJ for all that he lied about and tricking her into getting married before starting to be honest. But his horrible actions don’t negate the arrogance she speaks with. I think one of the biggest issues in these forms is everyone’s way of over generalizing. It leads to a lot of misunderstandings due to not clearly and specifically talking about what they mean. I’m sure it is also a lack of thinking through what people are saying. Cuz because I do t like her and think she’s nuts doesn’t mean I blame her. Those are two different conversations. I just think she let herself get swept up instead of really pressing for more information. She still wouldn’t have gotten the whole truth but she could have caught on to more red flags.

      • originalschmidt@alien.topB
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        10 months ago

        I think she gets caught up pressing for more information because it’s already soo difficult for her to get info from TJ. She can definitely be a bit over confident at times but idk I’m getting a feminist energy from her and I sometimes find myself doing the same in an attempt to match a male energy, kind of an “I can do that too” kinda way so I guess I understand it more. I also think her facial expressions are quirky and adorable. The screaming is definitely over the top but I hate to judge too harshly because relationships can bring out the best but they can also being out the worst and some of my worst was during fights with a partner, so I just try to remember I don’t know the full story and I also could react the same way… what’s the line from Wicker Park? Love makes us do crazy things…