I can’t decide who is more ridiculous out of this couple. Justin is a transphobic dating a trans woman. It is obvious he is repulsed by her. Nikki not only looks ridikkulous but is not right in the head for dating a transphobic guy and then thinks it somehow socially acceptable to meet his friends and immediately start complaining to them that Justin won’t eat her out. Kudos to the friend standing at the bar listening to all this without barfing into her drink.

  • Impeachykeene@alien.topB
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    1 year ago

    Igor is not transphobic. He was traumatized by a trans person who utterly betrayed his trust, so now he’s having a hard time getting past that trauma. He was in a sexual relationship that required his consent and knowledge of the fact that the person he was having sex with is trans. He was not given the opportunity to give informed consent, which to me is another form of sexual assault. Her expecting him to have any enthusiasm about engaging sexually with his assailant/the person who sexually traumatized him is beyond bonkers. This ain’t a soap opera, they ain’t Luke and Laura, and people don’t tend to fall in love with the person who sexually traumatized them. Igor is doing his best to get beyond the trauma, but it doesn’t seem to be working. I’d give him credit for trying, but I’m still uncertain of his motives, so I’ll hold off on that unless/until he shows some genuine emotional connection to her. But if he can’t, Nikki has nobody but herself to blame. She weaponized being trans to devastate him during a spat. I just don’t see how they get past that.

    • FML-dot-com@alien.topB
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      1 year ago

      Thank you for saying you believe it was a form of sexual assault. I wanted to pose this as a question but wasn’t sure how without sounding biased. I absolutely believe that without consent, it was a form of sexual assault. That is something that can warp someone’s mind for life. At the very least, they need professional intervention. I don’t think that will happen and I’m not sure it would fix anything. Both of them need to process their understanding of what a relationship is because what is going on there is sick. It’s really really dysfunctional on so many levels. I’m uncertain of Igor’s motives at this point as well. These two are definitely toxic with one another and are horrible partners. Nikki has no redeeming qualities to me at this point. Like you, all I see is an abuser trying to mold their victim into an imagined identity. Yeah, not a soap opera. Real humans facing real life consequences.

    • oooheycait1223@alien.topB
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      1 year ago

      This 👏🏻 👏🏻 👏🏻 thank you. I’m seriously surprised there isn’t more uproar about this. To me I was completely shocked and mortified when Nikki said that she kept that from him until they got into a fight, then pretty much just threw it in his face like “well guess what? I used to be a man!” Like that’s some sort of joke. If I was a young guy I would be absolutely traumatized by that bc that is such a huge deception and betrayal, and I really do consider that a form of sexual assault. Nikki can say “I just didn’t want to feel rejected”. Well igor/Justin should have at least had the option or opportunity to make that decision. Absolutely terrible

      • synaptic_drift@alien.topB
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        1 year ago

        If I was a young guy I would be absolutely traumatized by that bc that is such a huge deception and betrayal, and I really do consider that a form of sexual assault.

        But she told him before she arrived. Most likely years ago.

        Dude didn’t refuse her money.

      • Embarrassed-Loquat-1@alien.topB
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        1 year ago

        It absolutely is sexual assault. Anyone who disagrees needs to listen to/watch the whole scenario again. I asked my husband what he would do if someone did that to him at that age… he said the first thing he’d do would probably be to cry & I don’t blame him OR Igor. That doesn’t make them transphobic… it means the person values honesty and bodily autonomy… (which EVERYONE should 🤷🏼‍♀️)

      • Lancer_Evo_Panama@alien.topB
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        1 year ago

        Lol exactly having sex with someone and not telling them your real sex is sexual assault

        In my country a few people have been murdered because of this it’s not because they are trans they have slept with men and not disclosed

        Later they find out and bad shit happens

      • mothermurder88@alien.topB
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        1 year ago

        YES. THIS. What I really want are the details of the argument that led up to her spilling the secret. Was it an argument over dishes, or was it him saying he didn’t want to be with her for whatever reason and her going full nuclear on his ass.

        • Magemaud@alien.topB
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          1 year ago

          I remember reading that the argument had something to do with them differing on what they considered gender roles when he came to the US on the K1 Visa. Nikki accused Igor of being lazy and not helping with the housework and apparently when he replied something like it was “woman’s work” she snapped and told him that she used to be a man.

          • mothermurder88@alien.topB
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            1 year ago

            That’s wild.

            My ex-husband was stationed overseas for a year. There was an incident where someone a few bases over went out into town and picked up a girl. Only to find out later it was a man. The guy beat the shit out of the trans woman when he found out. I don’t remember the exact details of it, but he may have even killed her. It didn’t even happen at the base my ex was on, but no one was allowed to go out into town for a good long while after this happened.

            It’s just crazy to me to put yourself in a situation like that when you absolutely don’t know how someone is going to react to what they’re hearing. That’s not a small thing to drop in someone’s lap, and Nikki just shrugs it off and almost laughs.

    • Bhoppy23@alien.topB
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      1 year ago

      Luke and Laura, I’m dying over here!! I agree that he was traumatized, he even said as much when he said he sometimes can’t get past the fact that Nikki was a man and still dominates certain aspects.

    • OGgunter@alien.topB
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      1 year ago

      Informed consent is: “I’d like to touch your genitals, do you have a preference on the type of touch you like?” Informed consent is NOT: a detailed history of any and all medical procedures or body modifications. Disclosing information that may endanger them (trans ppl are statistically more likely to be victims than abusers).

      For any cis ppl still confused, pls outline at which point you explicitly describe your gender presentation and genitals to potential sexual partners, what type of history you provide as to their shape or function, etc. Nikki being a reality show stereotype doesn’t negate the reality of how trans ppl exist in actual reality.