Honestly - if my husband: -lied to my about my role in the marriage until immediately after the marriage -let his family ice me out -completely disregards my feelings -disregards the fact that I am depressed & tells me it’s a personal problem -gaslight the shit out of me every time I tried to talk about my feelings
I would probably scream too. I hear ya Kimberly! I’m starting to feel manic for her
I feel like everyone forgot that Kim told her husband’s brother months ago how she really feels about living with the family. She does not like them and repels their generosity. Should she have been told Indian wife customs by her husband? Yes. Does google exist? Also, yes.
Kim brings an American individualistic outlook going into a culture of collectivism and she is resistant to learning how to be a part of HER new family.
Jenny clocked her in that preview for the tell-all, “entitled little brat.”
India is not a monolith. Not every family expects the exact same customs, and apparently TJ’s family is especially strict. Plus he blatantly lied to her about it. And you can be collectivist all you want but when it turns into misogyny it’s not okay. Enforced gender roles are not okay. Many Indian women feel that way too.
People are free to live as traditionally as they want to but it should be a choice. And yes, I mean globally. Culture is not more important than people’s right to self-determination.
You’re weird…maybe go experience it for yourself before making random assumptions. I’m Indian and the culture is absolutely suffocating to daughter in laws. 🙄
Does google exist? Also, yes.
I thought that too when she was upset about not knowing what was going on in the wedding. Like did you not research this at all?
Right because people are honest about what they want and google explains every aspect of 1,000,000,000 people’s lives 🙄
Because a lot of the those rituals are only performed by the Brahmins or are esoteric. You’d be surprised how much is unavailable or unreliable on google.
i woulda started screaming way sooner in that convo…
I agree with you, but she is still a b…
Nah. She’s justified in leaving, but not terrorizing everyone while she does it. Then, doubling down on being a wench.
Honestly all they said in this episode is that she refuses to interact with them and it makes it all awkward.
They didn’t say anything about chores, it was just she doesn’t come down and we are afraid to go up. If she wanted she could come down interact a bit, phone translate like Paul did for Karine. Like it’s really not as difficult as she’s making it out to be. I understand her being homesick but if she communicated that with them I’m sure they would understand.
Exactly this. Idk why everyone’s acting like his family is harassing her, it seems they want to include her. But also her talking about being lonely, depressed, trapped in the house? Didn’t she used to live there? What did she do then? Sit in her flat doing nothing all day? I doubt it.
Rewatch the first scene with family all the way to the last comment by yash. They were not welcoming and expected something very different from TJ as the first born Indian son. There was no way she could have lived up to that expectation.
She lived in India, in probably a westernized area, for a year. She didn’t live with TJs family
People also forgot that she had 2 YEARS to study Hindi. That will take you much further than just basic conversations.
Gosh, even I learned conversational Hindi from watching Bollywood movies with subtitles. I hate when she blames not knowing the language. Stop being lazy…
P.S.: I hate TJ too, no worries. 🤣
I also wouldn’t be going downstairs for meals after the cow shit fiasco.
Ugh yes, I’d be done eating any food that came out of that downstairs kitchen.
Maybe that’s why her stomach was upset on her wedding day, TJs mom cooked her something with a “special ingredient” 🤢
Oh my god 😳
And that doesn’t even cover the burning poo and sprinkled pee
The last we saw of Kimberly was two days after the wedding. She was happy and fixing up the apartment then the poop and pee fiasco and then it is 3-4 months later and she is despondent with depression and feels hopeless and trapped. Why did production not go get updates on her? We knew her formal duties were commencing, we new she had declared her independence to do things her way….why did they not get scenes of her decline. I feel kind of cheated. We see her death scream and TJ running to mummy and the next thing we know she is in a NY studio filming The Tell All. After the buildup for months, I feel the story pre-climax was missed. Maybe they will have a The Other Way More To Love with deleted scenes before Monday that will include what all we missed.
“Titty Baby” bahahahahaha!!
I loved how she managed to work in all the pejorative names he hates to be called…. without actually calling him any of them.
I for one am perfectly fine not seeing the decline. Tj is intolerable. TLC probably did it to up ratings for the tell all. Because they are TLC and assume we will tolerate it because the girl screams and cusses when she is (usually reasonably) upset.
I’m fine not seeing it as well, but it’s a strange thing to omit from a 20 episode season. Hard to believe this thing started in early July
Well the Bitch had to know Google to get signed up for the show……so she can’t claim that she or her family never had the opportunity to find out what she was signing herself up for.
I don’t think everyone in India is TJ and he is the problem.
We’ve had quite a few Indian people and white people married into Indian families comment on how TJ’s family is not normal so I don’t think Google would have helped her. Indian culture is not a monolith… it hasn’t even been United as a singular nation for very long.
In India there are many different sub cultures but I can tell you for sure that all of them (except the westernized folk especially from upper middle class to higher) live somewhat the way TJ and his family live.
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most indian families are known to live together. If you watch a Hindi teledrama on Netflix you’ll know what this entails.
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Indian families treat their mothers like gods and hold their word to the highest regard. So calling him a titty baby isn’t even an insult to him. I’m sure he’s wondering what the fuck she even means by that.
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the younger son is treated like a baby.
These are very common things among Indian cultures that you can find through Google (go to Netflix, YouTube or so many other websites with documentaries and TV shows).
Kimberly was aware of this, she even asked TJ if she would be expected to do the house manager role and he lied and told her no.
Why are so many people ignoring that this happened?
Yeah. She knew what she was getting into and when she asked questions he omitted facts (lied). When she asked more questions he just did his stupid cheesy toothy smile and cocked his head sideways. And again deflected. She asked. He just didn’t answer. And she had been there before. He probably most likely as per usual omitted things once again or painted things in such a light so she would be okay with it.
Both are to blame. Him constantly omitting truths and deflecting and her thinking she can go into a family with her American ways and get her way. She knew what she was getting into (on the family level, how tight knit it is and how living arrangements and things would be.) She thought she could have it her way and has now ran into a wall and she can’t handle it. She is definitely not blameless in all of this.
TJ shoulda just married a Hindu girl. His brother is smart in saying when he gets married he is marrying a Hindu girl. She knows the program and will hit the ground running.
Yeah good points. It was naive she took him at his word cause he does seem to have been lying or withholding info all throughout the relationship and he definitely should’ve just married a Hindu girl, I’m genuinely confused why he didn’t…
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Yeah, I’m always curious what the actual filming schedule is sometimes. Very possible in this example that production was in country this whole time, but they were filming other Indian couples.
There was a moment in Gino and Jasmine’s last full season where they were pretending all the events took place in one trip that Gino had taken to Panama. The problem was for their last few scenes it was obvious that Jasmine had gotten some new plastic surgery and had fully recovered from that. So they were showing two different Gino trips and acting like it was all sequential. Or Gino was there for a long time.
I agree! In fact, this whole season felt rushed to me, like they filmed as quick as possible, instead of taking their time to get more details…
I wonder how them cutting the show from what used to be two hours down to one hour so they could squeeze The Last Resort and Family Chantel in at the 9:00 hour, did that lead to scenes being cut? I know the season was many months long, but was a lot chopped out because of the shortened length or did they just make up for that by having the season forever weeks long? Very odd that Kimberly’s saga was so chopped up. Even if she wasn’t going downstairs or going out, we could have seen her explain what was happening instead of only showing their breakup fight. Usually there is something after a breakup fight…showing them packing, saying goodbye….nothing….maybe during the Tell All they will show scenes explaining all this.
TLC chose to script bs for Jasmine and Gino instead of film Kimberly unravel while TJ is clueless and torn. I’d rather watch Kimberly scream in frustration than Jasmine’s fake crying.
She is absolutely not justified. She isn’t even trying. She can use an app? She can go online and meet expats? She could learn Hindi? DO SOMETHING and stop feeding into her mental illness. She’s a grown ass woman, not a child. Own up to your shit and do something about it.
Oh and TJ sucks
Ah yes, the classic depression cure: just, like, fix it! Duh
/s
Nah I have some pretty deep rooted issues and have done some have dealt with horrible horrible trauma. I’m all for feeling your emotions but also, she decided to do this. Fkn own up to the change and be an adult about it. I work with children who have mental health issues/disabilities/ and am also a special education teacher. If I let my students deal with their problems with maladaptive behaviors, who am I really helping out? There is a difference between being gentle with yourself and enabling your mental illness. Esp as an adult. You have to own up to your actions by then. If not by adulthood, then when?
🌈 🦄 depressed? Just google it! Learn a complex foreign language?
Dude I learned conversational Hindi from watching Bollywood movies with subtitles. It’s not hard and she had over 2 years to learn it. She has a YT channel and there are many free Hindi classes. She’s just lazy. They both suck.
Then don’t move to another country if your mind can’t handle it. Know your boundaries. She has none
As an expat, there are alot of things I handle but if people lie to me before i get into a situation, like here, I can’t know if my mind can handle it or not.
Where were y’all 20 episodes ago? TJ and his family’s pathology was apparent the first time we saw them - yet too many of you were focused on being nit picky regarding Kimberly’s personality. There was an elephant in the room the entire time and you’re just finally seeing it.
Thx, was thinking that the whole time. The against her was not fair. They tortured her and the last conversation with TJ shows how. He answered to completely different things what she hadn’t said. I screamed with her in my head. She just wanted a hug and he insulted her for feeling lonely.
exactly. The first time TJ’s brother told her to yes, give up all freedoms and do what we say, I was on her side
I was on her side too, yes; but she should have realized to that this was not a family worth marrying into. I would refuse to marry anyone if their family treated me like that. Love isn’t enough and they have to be willing to back you up from toxic family members like this, otherwise they are just as bad for staying back and letting it happen.
Two things can be possible at once: Kimberly is so entitled and bratty people dislike her, and tj is a crappy partner whose answer is to break up anytime Conflict arises
It’s almost 2024, we don’t have to choose sides anymore and can acknowledge they both have their flaws
Well it’s only 2024 western cultures. it’s 20 BC everywhere else.
Thank you….perfect response. Not sure why Kimberly gets a pass when they were both stupid to get married when there were obviously too many differences to overcome
Because people, no matter whether they are a man or a woman, like to nitpick on ANY part of a female’s personality that they don’t agree with. The men are misogynists and the other women want to “be chosen” by these misogynistic men so they will agree with them left and right without knowing the full context of the situation. They think, “Woman bad! She’s crazy!” or anything along those lines. If it was a different reality show with a different couple, people will ALWAYS make fun of the woman first.
Agreed. Was thinking along similar lines… a lot of women are very quick to attack or criticize other women.
And it’s absolutely insane. What’s worse is that a lot of them don’t even REALIZE they are doing it - because it’s so normal just to attack women for being themselves and not doing what misogynistic men want. This is how awfully women are still treated in 2023. Just fucking depressing. And we’re the only people who can stand up and stop this treatment - but most of us just continue to go along with it…
Right….because women need to support other women even if they are crazy, immature, make terrible decisions and generally act like a loon? Just because it’s another woman? They can both be idiots…she isn’t blameless
Prime example of the exact woman I am talkkng about right here!
Your screen name is prefect for you 👌🏼 Keep up being a negative force in the universe…
Right? Meanwhile people have been dragging her the whole season, I never understood it honestly.
I notice the first episode and hoped she would run
People were too busy telling Kimberley to rESeArCh the cULtUrE
Meanwhile TJ and his family don’t have to understand American culture…and don’t even try. Just understand OURS.
I’ve said it many times before and I’ll say it again! People just love to think that their own situation will be different because nOt AlL mEn FrOm iNdIa are the same!! lol these are what I like to call overly positive personalities. And because they refuse to see red flags in any situation they always get themselves in deep shit and then cry to reddit, “But why me!!! I thought it would be different for me!!!”
Pretty sure if you are in someone else’s country, it’s on you to adapt. Kimberly is insufferable….how anyone can defend her is crazy. She knew what she was getting into.
It’s not fair that he lied to her about his expectations then expect her to adapt.
I agree that he is also to blame in this whole mess. No one’s hands are clean here. But how did Kimberly still marry TJ after she realized the families expectations? She is either stupid or crazy.
That’s a one-sided view if I ever heard one. It’s called we are all humans and if you want someone to understand your culture you should be also willing to do the same. Relationships are two way streets.
That’s what happens when you agree to marry into someone else’s family and culture in another country. You don’t want that? Then find another partner.
My people are in this thread!😭
Yup, like you can research an ENTIRE culture and all of its variations and intricacies
Either her entire thing is an act for TV fame or that family will all wind up dead, the look in her eyes every time she gets angry is terrifying.
It’s the look of a woman lied to and gaslighted. Watch out.
All I can say is that I dated a Pakistani man for around a year. I had waaaayyyyy less contact with his family and even then I knew it wasn’t going to work out. There’s no way she spent time in India and with his family and didn’t know she was going to have to contribute to the family dynamic. I’m not saying it’s right or wrong but she wasn’t in the dark. She’s not mentally healthy and she needs therapy.
DAE think Yash had a crush on Kim or at the very least was super jealous of Tejaswi?
100 that’s why he said by the grace of God let me marry a Hindu girl, because he read telling God before that he wanted something else.
Oh definitely! The way he looks at her is so hungry and hateful. Just like a spurned man with low self esteem.
I kind of had that feeling.
Clearly, she isn’t getting up at 5 AM to make breakfast for the family and do chores around the house. Can’t help but believe this also extends to her “wifely” duties, because her husband seems to want her gone.
Her husband is probably still sleeping with mommy!!
And why should she if she didn’t agree to this beforehand and was deceived about her roles with “don’t worry about this?”
I do think she has valid concerns and issues, what’s causing more problems is her way of expressing those concerns. Especially the moment she’s challenged.
When bringing up issues it should always be assumed a full back-and-forth discussion is needed and if you need a moment to think to counter something, take that moment. Don’t just break down and scream?
But also, I get the frustration with not being heard. There’s a point where you just have to leave toxic people and situations like that. And if I were her, I’d have left way sooner.
What exactly is she supposed to say when she clearly communicates that she’s depressed and would like him to hug her and he says “I’m not doing that?” There’s not much more back and forth left to do at that point.
Screaming is not going to do anything productive. It’s only going to make things worse for yourself and it enables the person you’re trying to reason with being able to justify that you’re the irrational one.
I agree that the whole family is unbearable. That’s why if people treat you like that and there’s nothing you can do to make it better, remove yourself from them. There’s no need to make the situation worse. There was plenty of reason for her to leave even before they got married, it was obvious no one in that family has any intention of growing or changing for the better.
She screamed because she was so frustrated that she literally couldn’t hold it in, she didn’t do it purposely to be a brat.
That’s still not a healthy or appropriate way to respond. I’d understand a toddler doing that but as an adult it’s not acceptable.
She has choices. She chose to continue to remain there and be treated that way.
AGAIN, because this seems to be going over your head, she’d never have to scream if she just avoided and left these people. It’s completely avoidable. She’s not being held against her will.
She doesn’t want to leave, she wants to be treated better. That’s why she’s so frustrated. Some people want to fight for their marriage and not just leave when times are tough.
Being mature and wise means knowing what you can and cannot control. You can’t control how other people act but you can control how you respond. Screaming is immature. Knowing when to leave is mature.
Being mature and wise means knowing what you can an cannot control. You can’t control how other people act but you can control how you respond. Screaming is immature. Knowing when to leave is mature.
This whole situation has been tough from the beginning. There was no indication it’d get better. Anyone who thinks a situation like that would get better is honestly very delusional.
I agree completely, but There is a whole hell of a lot else that came between the wedding and this convo and if we are honest this was a breakup conversation between Kim and Tjs mom. Because tj cannot effectively communicate with either of them. His mother is in the power role over him and he assumed he would have the same role over Kim.